If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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