So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
not ubering you a puppy
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
