It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
