i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
