how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize