If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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