his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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