everyone is single if you try hard enough
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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