I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
