I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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