Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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