Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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