so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I can't turn off my feet"
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Randomize
