I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Shame is for Republicans.
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