I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
