I'm going to rape someone's good day.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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