Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
