I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I have aggressive nipples.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
