whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
