Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
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