I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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