Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
