And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
