I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
