i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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