I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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