Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
