never play flip cup with pint glasses
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
