Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
