speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Randomize
