Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I am naked and annoyed.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
