PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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