you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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