Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
