forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
