So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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