All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize