id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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