so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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