Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
