Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
