The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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