You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
How external is "for external use only"?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
