i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
