we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize