We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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