i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
