Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Randomize
