Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
