i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
