he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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