Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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